Funny excuses for missing school

August 14, 2007

‘Dear teacher, my son is under a doctor’s care and should not attend P.E. today. Please execute him’.

I’ve chanced upon a bunch of actual notes which were written by parents to explain their child’s absence from school. Some of these are unintentionally funny due to errors in spelling and grammar, while the others are just plain hilarious (or they’re written by parents who really couldn’t give a hoot). This collection was formed through enthusiastic submissions of the notes by teachers in a particular state of the U.S.A.; be it for educational or entertainment value.

Here they are.

Please excuse Roland for missing school today. He fell from a tree and misplaced his hip. Did they check the tree??

Chris could not come to school cause he has an acre on his side.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He hurt his growing part. Hmm.

Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I took her to the doctor and have her shot. Tough love.

Irving was absent from school yesterday because he missed his bust.

I had to keep Billie home because we’re gonna go Christmas shopping and I don’t know what size she would wear.

John was absent because he had two teeth taken out from his face. Who’s teeth was it?

Dear school: Please ekscuse Johnny being absent on Jan 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it on Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

Please excuse Jimmy for being sick. It was his father’s fault.

And my personal favourite…

Please excuse Pedro for being absent yesterday. He had diahre dyrea direathe the shits.

That’s all, folks! :D

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3 Responses to “Funny excuses for missing school”

  1. princessGRET. said

    that’s hilarious !

  2. hello there. looks like a nice article to me. bookmarking it and will read for sure.

  3. This is the right blog for anyone who wants to find out about this topic. You realize so much its almost hard to argue with you (not that I actually would want…HaHa). You definitely put a new spin on a topic thats been written about for years. Great stuff, just great!

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